Song for No One

Song of the day

2 Days in Paris

Dialogue from 2 Days in Paris.. I only included the parts that really struck me as the most interesting. Great movie!

Here it is
One more one less
Another wasted love story
I really loved this one

Always the same with me
Break up, break down
Drink up fool around
Meet one guy, then another, fuck around
Fuck around to forget the one and only

There's a moment in life where you can't recover any more from another break-up. And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time, well you still can’t live without him. And even if he wakes you up every day by sneezing right in your face, well you love his sneezes more than anyone else's kisses

Sweet Disposition

Sweet disposition
Never too soon
Oh, reckless abandon
Like no one's watching you

A moment, a love
A dream aloud
A kiss, a cry
Our rights, our wrongs
A moment, a love
A dream aloud
A moment, a love
A dream aloud

So stay there
Because I'll be coming over
And while our blood's still young
It's so young
It runs
And we won't stop until it's over
Won't stop to surrender

Songs of desperation
I played them for you
A moment, a love
A dream aloud
A kiss, a cry
Our rights, our wrongs
A moment, a love
A dream, aloud
A moment, a love
A dream aloud


This is the first song I've heard in a while that really captivated me. To me this song is about longing and desire, and how human those emotions make you feel. Nothing makes you feel so alive.

chica perdida

Unemployed for 6 months now. Well not including my short stint at Bar Johnny.

What should I do with myself?

a) go back to another job in online media
b) wait tables, bartend, and travel for a bit
c) runaway with a studly Italian man

Just kidding about c :)
I'm going to attempt to look for any job tomorrow.. gotta pay the bills!

I see a bad moon rising

I see a bad moon rising, I see trouble on the way.

It's December 19th.. I have bronchitis and am getting laid off of work today. I get to go home for Christmas.. Home being a complete nightmare.

Merry Christmas to all. I feel like the Grinch.

Hope you got your things together.
Hope you are quite prepared to die.
Looks like were in for nasty weather.
One eye is taken for an eye.

I know things will work out.. they always do. It's just tough to be cheerful in times like this. I'm so indecisive.. have no clue what I want to do with my life, career, future. Should I stay in San Francisco.. should I run away from my problems like I always do? I want to roam and experience new people, places...

Sick and tired of being sick and tired

I've had some sort of illness off and on for the past three weeks.. I'm TIRED OF IT!!! ahhhhh!!

Funny SNL skit.. must see!

New Killers Album

One of my favorite songs from the Album. Going to see them on December 12 :D

The Dustland Fairytale beginning
With just another white trash county kiss in '61.
Long brown hair, and foolish eyes.
He'd look just like you'd want him to
Some kind of slick chrome American prince.

Blue Jean serenade
Moon river what'd you do to me.
I don't believe you.

Saw Cinderella in a party dress, she was looking for a nightgown.
I saw the devil wrapping up his hands, he's getting ready for the showdown.
I saw the minute that I turned away, I got my money on a pawn tonight.

Change came in disguise of revelation, set his soul on fire.
She said she always knew he'd come around.
And the decades disappear
Like sinking ships but we persevere.
God gives us hope but we still fear, we don't know.

Your mind is poisoned.
Castles in the sky, sit stranded, vandalized.
The drawbridge is closing.

Saw Cinderella in a party dress, she was looking for a nightgown.
I saw the devil wrapping up his hands, he's getting ready for the showdown.
I saw the ending where they turned the page, I threw my money and I ran away.
Straight to the valley of the great divide
Out where the dreams all hide.
Out where the wind don't blow,
Out where the good girls die.
And the sky moves slow
I hear the bird don't sing
I hear the field don't blow
I hear the bell don't ring
I hear the bell don't ring
Out here the good girls die
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge.
Why don't you know the kingdoms under siege and everybody needs you
Is there still magic in the midnight sun, or did you leave it back in '61?
In the cadence of a young man's eyes.
Out where the dreams all hide

High on Life

I'm feeling rough, I'm feeling raw, I'm in the prime of my life.
This is our decision, to live fast and die young.
We've got the vision, now let's have some fun.
Yeah, it's overwhelming, but what else can we do.
Get jobs in offices, and wake up for the morning commute.

Today is one of those days where I'm high on life. Last night I had a really fun night out (yes a WEDNESDAY). Everyone told me that I looked so happy.. One person even told me he wished he could "bottle my energy". The past month I've feel like I've transformed. I'm no longer the scared/unsure little girl. I'm confidant in myself, know my potential, and just want to "be" more. Make sense? Probably not.

I'm in the prime of my life and enjoying it. I'm single and am really taking time to grow as a person. Instead of worrying about what he (any of the "he's" I've had) may think, do, or say.

I feel so lucky to be where I am. No, I don't have a lot of money or lots of expensive things. But I have good friends and live in a great city. I'm so lucky to have made it this far, considering where I've been.

Dream World

Dream World by Robin Thicke

I would be you, you would be me, we would be one,
we would be just fine The ice caps wouldn't be
melting and neither would I, mmh I would just
drive my big old car, and everything would be
alright And energy would just fall down right from the sky, yeah

Words would fly right from out of my mind, out of
my mind into your heart, into your life And
everything would sound just right, and no one
would stop me from drinking my wine

That's my dreamworld, that's my dreamworld, it's
more than a dream My dreamworld, that's my
dreamworld, and I wanna live in my dream, (dream)

For the real world just don't feel right I
wouldn't spend my days searching for, searching
for lost time, yeah hey yee (ooh ooh, dream) I
wouldn't be so damn sensitive, I'd let things go
by No matter what the weather, I'd learn to
change, I'd change with the time, yeah he

And everytime I need a woman, she'd appear right
by me She hold me tight, treat me right, and tell
me that everything is gonna be, is gonna be alright, alright

That's my dreamworld, that's my dreamworld

I would tell Van Gogh that he was loved, there's
no need to cry I would say Marvin Gay your father
didn't want you to die (dream) There would be no
black and white, the world just treat my wife
right We could down in Mississipi and no one would
look at us twice

That's my dreamworld, that's my dreamworld, it's
more than a dream That's my dreamworld, that's my
dreamworld, and I wanna live in my dream

Salute to my Soldier

I'm feeling melanchonly today. I logged into my myspace account (which I only keep because a few of my friends from home REFUSE to get facebook) and see my brothers status is "depressed". My 24 year old brother is in Iraq as we speak.

It's a Thursday morning.. I'm walking through the Financial District in San Francisco en route to work. Sipping my tall Vanilla Latte listening to the Slate Daily Podcast. On the other side of the world my younger brother is in Iraq. He's 24, married, and has an adopted son.

My Friday night? Drinks with my friends until probably 2am (or later). I'm 25 years old, single, and living my life to the fullest. But am I really? I can't help but feel selfish for living so haphazardly. Life is short so I fully intend to live every day as it was my last. However, when I look back I want to be able to say I've contributed to society and helped others as well.

I'm not going home for Thanksgiving so I've signed up to volunteer at a homeless shelter on Thanksgiving day.

Burning Man 2008

I spent my labor day weekend at Burning Man in Black Rock Desert, Nevada. For those of you who aren't familiar with it I will attempt to explain. BM is a week long gathering of people from all over the world. It's basically all about art and self expression. Nothing is impossible at BM. Anything that you want can and will happen.

Most people assume BM is just a huge drug party in the desert, and of course to some people it is.. but for me it was much more.

For a few days I felt truly free.. free from any sort of communication with the outside world (no computer, cellphone, TV.. NOTHING), free from criticism or judgements, free to act or be anyone I chose to. In this case, I chose to be myself and do exactly what I wanted.

I enjoyed the art installations, took pictures, laughed, cried, acted like a complete FOOL. I had the time of my life. Because of the experiences I had at BM, I made a lot of life changing decisions. It seems so rudimentary and basic, but for a long time I've lived to please others. Mainly in the relationship I've been this year. I changed in order to please other people in my life, instead of pleasing myself.

Since BM I've begin to volunteer, take up activities that I've been wanting to try, begin writing again, reading more, and just have fun.

Me

This is me:

Not so sure what I want to be "when I grow up"
Uses her walk to and from work as "thinking time"
Smiles.. constantly
Will laugh at anything.. even when its inappropriate
LOVE chocolate
Mojitos make my world go around
LOVE LOVE LOVES music.. ALWAYS listening to music
Katharine Graham is my hero
Curses like a sailor.. 2009 NY Resolution?
Favorite color is green
Cynical about love and "finding the one" yet a hopeless romantic
like to make people laugh
Enjoys writing "stream of thought"
Love dancing
Tulips, Irises, Lillies, and Orchids.. enough said
Dislike fake people
Am a huge flirt
Quote lines from movies and The Office too much
Have a 6 year old german shep mix named Lexie who I adore :)
Haven't traveled enough
Couldn't survive without red meat
Cries at weddings or movies about weddings
Loves finding unknown music.. Hate it when my super secret groups become mainstream
Would rather read a book than watch TV ANY DAY
Fall in love quickly and out of love just as quickly.. does that mean I wasn't in love in the first place?
Knows every word to Like a Rollingstone by Bob Dylan

Just one of those days

I'm feeling really down today, I think I might cry?

Rollercoaster

Excuse me while I blab...


Did you just burp?
jackass

Never thought it would happen
before the scars even healed

Were they really scars or just scratches?
Scratches from a lapse of judgement
The tons of bricks shatter
Bring me back down
To reality

Told you so
Why must I ignore that voice
In the back of my mind

Move forward
Not backwards

Scared little girl
Don't poison me
I'm allergic

Choking on my fears
What if it happened again?
This time worse

Because this time I play
For keeps
Not 18 year old thrills

Move forward
Not backwards

What if
What if is pointless
We're all adults here
At least we pretend

Why does it always come to this?

Ch ch ch chaaaanges!

I got a new job and started this past Monday.. so far so good. Lots of opportunity :)

I took this Personal DNA test thing.. pretty dead on I think!





You are a Director

As a DIRECTOR, you combine an unusual openness and passion for beauty and style with confidence and a down-to-earth sensibility that allow you to realize your vision.

You are practical and pay attention to the details that others tend to miss.

By focusing on what is real and concrete, you achieve more than those who always have their heads in the clouds.

When it comes to what really matters in your life, you are confident in your ability to succeed.

Having beautiful things in your life gives you pleasure and satisfaction - you have a keen eye for style.

Even when problems present themselves, deep down you know you will overcome these challenges.

When routines get too familiar, you become bored and start looking for ways to spice things up.

You are open to new types of experiences – you are not afraid to take a risk on something new.

You have a highly developed sense of taste – you know what looks good on you, in your home, and in the world at large.

You tend to do things on the spur of the moment, not sticking to a set schedule.


If you want to be different:

Occasionally let yourself dream a little more, even if it doesn't seem practical or efficient.


how you relate to others
You are Advocating

Being social, empathic, and understanding makes you ADVOCATING.

Some people find being around others exhausting—but not you! You are energized by spending time with friends, and you are good at meeting new people.

One of the reasons you enjoy conversation as much as you do is that you often learn about yourself while talking things out with a friend; you realize things about your own beliefs while discussing them with others.

You have insight into what others are thinking and feeling. This ability allows you to be happy for others, and to commiserate when something has gone wrong for them.

You are highly compassionate, and being conscious of how things affect those close to you leaves you cautious about trusting others too hastily.

Despite these reservations, you are open-minded when it comes to your worldview; you don't look to impose your ways on others.

Your sensitivity towards others' plights contributes to an understanding—both intellectual and emotional—of many different perspectives.

As someone who understands the complexities of the world around you, you are reluctant to pass judgments.


If you want to be different:

While it's important to think about others, don't forget to take some time for yourself, and occassionally to put yourself first.

Take some time to spend with a few close friends; although it's difficult to find people to trust, it's worth the effort.

When you have great ideas, it can be hard to relinquish control, but it can also feel good to take the pressure off and enjoy someone else leading the way.

As of July 2, 2009:

What I think:

- Podcasts are the greatest thing since sliced bread! Seriously, this is how I stay up-to-date on current events, popculture, and politics. Every morning on my walk to and from work I listen to podcasts. My faves are the Slate podcasts. Very informative and hilarious at the same time.

- Real Simple is a great publication

- San Francisco summers SUCK.. although I can't say I miss the 90 degree Louisiana weather either

- I need a vacation!!



To do list for July:

Take Lexie to the vet
set up a savings account
Finish reading "What is the What" and "Made to Stick"
Read up on Darfur
Find a charitee to volunteer at on a regular basis

Chasing Pavements

Ive made up my mind
dont need to think it over
if im wrong i am right
dont need to look no further
this aint lust i know this is love

but if i tell the world
i'll never say enough
cos it was not said to you
and thats exactly what i need to do
if i end up with you

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads no where,
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place should i leave it there.
should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere

i build myself up
and fly around in circles
waiting as my heart drops
and my back begins to tingle
finally could this be it

or should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads no where,
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place should i leave it there.
should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads no where,
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place
should i leave it there

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere

yeaaah ehh

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere
or would it be a waste
even if i new my place should i leave it there

should i give up
or should i just keep on chasing pavements
should i just keep on chasing pavements

ooooohhh

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads no where,
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place
should i leave it there

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads no where

Aries

Aries are fire signs and those born under this element are regarded in astrology as adventurous, active and outgoing. It won't matter where you go or how remote or unusual it is - from the Outback to the Antarctic - you can be sure that an Aries has been there before you (or at the very least you will meet one along the way!) Aries is a uniquely naive sign. Although they are independent, outgoing and assertive they are also surprisingly trusting, often innocently walking into the lion's den at times. No matter what upheaval, challenge or triumph they confront - an Aries has a wonderful ability to bounce back. Their faith in life and the future remains untouched by hardship. Their gift is that they are always children at heart and the world is always a magical place for them. Many famous sports people are born under this sign. Aries is regarded as the most physical sign and because of its Mar's rulership; it is also one of the most highly charged masculine energy signs in astrology. No wonder women born under Aries are forceful, dynamic and aggressive, and as a result these Aries women frequently find themselves with dilemmas surrounding their romantic relationships. For them, a man has to be a 'real man' to deal with an Aries woman, otherwise she intimidates him. And conversely for the Aries male, a woman has to be a real woman to deal with him, because he is looking for many balancing component traits (his true feminine side) in his partner. She has to run the gamut in his support system, from the Aries man's best friend, true companion, through to his muse, and yet she must never ever answer him back!

Therefore Aries can be a confusing sign because there is a complex combination of very strong masculine and feminine expressions all combined together. Because of the male energy surrounding it, when a woman is born under Aries, it creates some of the most interesting women in the world, women who are adventurous, independent and have competitive natures. It also tends to make them very forthright.

But whether male or female, Aries people are 'doers' rather than 'talkers'. They are the impulsive, act first, ask questions or have doubts later, sign of the zodiac. That's why their lives are often filled with many dramas and sometimes even accidents! Their ability to live life close to the edge provides them with a wealth of 'real experience' to call upon. When an Aries person talks about something or somewhere they've usually done it or been there, rather than simply read about it in a book. Being active people Aries can't adapt to any kind of restriction, particularly possessive relationships. They often travel to escape any feelings of being stuck or possessed. Aries people love challenges. In fact, if everything is running smoothly, they are quite capable of going out and doing something (sometimes quite foolish) to rock the boat. Aries love to race in where angels fear to tread.



Could this be anymore me??? Might as well have taken out "Aries" and replaced it with "Sarah"

Comedian W. Kamau Bell

I saw his show last night and couldn't have been more impressed. Unlike other famous comedians today (Chris Rock, Sarah Silverman, and Dave Chappelle) Kamau has a message he is trying to get out. End Racism.

Far too many people make assumptions based on race, and of course everyone does this from time to time. Kamau brought these stereotypes and assumptions to light in a comical way.

70% of crimes are commited by "black people" someone states. Do 100% of black people commit crimes? NO. Don't hate the racial group, hate the individuals that commit the crimes.

46.5% of drug abusers are Caucasian. Do 100% of white people use drugs? NO.

Far too often we group "those people" together incorrectly. Can anyone change the color of their skin (except Michael Jackson of course)? NO. But you can improve is your attitude towards people who are "different" than you through increased education.

Almost a year!

If you haven't seen this movie, rent it.. HILARIOUS. It's a British Comedy, which I'm not usually a fan of.. Best comedy I've seen in a while. Think Meet the Parents, except at a funeral.

Anyway.. I haven't had much substance in my blog lately. I've been on this "positive thinking" kick, and I would rather not go into detail of my struggles lately. It hit me the other day while I was walking down Market Street on my lunch break. Every person I pass is another person dealing with their share of struggles. We all have issues and problems in life. Shit happens in life, to all of us. The key is learning how to deal with the everyday issues with grace, and not break down.

I've been living in San Francisco for almost a year now, and its been an amazing learning experience. I had no idea how sheltered and naive I was to the world before moving here. Growing up in a small town (Mobile, Alabama) then going to school in another small town (Baton Rouge, Louisiana)its so easy to forget that there is a big world out there. I didn't forget, and got away and have started my own life.

Things are a bit uncertain right now. Career wise I'm at a crossroads. I'm not exactly sure where I want to go with my career. I always thought that being a young and attractive woman had its advantages, however, I'm beginning to see a different trend. People see me as a cute girl, and assume I have no clue what I'm talking about. Being cute makes you have to work even harder to be taken seriously.

Things are uber competitive in the real world. Just because you have a pretty smile and a degree doesn't guarantee anything. I have more work experience than any of my friends from college, yet here I'm very very green. It's a big bad world out there, survival of the fittest. Don't jump into the pool unless you are prepared to swim. Lucky for me I've mastered the back stroke :)

I've fallen in love with San Francisco. Everyday on my walk to work I feel so blessed. I'm young and beautiful living in the best city in the US! I think this is going to be a lifetime love affair :)